The world has never been a safe place, but lately I’ve noticed hints of danger in unexpected places, such as this restaurant, presumably run by the homeowner in “Hansel and Gretel”:
Most of us would agree, I hope, that while TOTS may often be annoying, they should never be classed as edibles, either at home or in a BAR.
Different restaurant, but a similar hint of danger:
What will those hands do if the person they’re attached to actually does satanise them? I shudder to think.
Perhaps the person in the photo below used the “sataniser.” He’s Will Kirk, an amiable furniture restorer on The Repair Shop, which is an amiable television series:
It’s hard to envision Will, a newlywed, in a martial (warlike) home. But according to Hello! magazine, there he is.
Strictly speaking the next photo doesn’t depict danger, but it certainly opens up some awful possibilities (e.g. arteries and veins) for a careless user:
Usually I can figure out what the sign intends to say (Will’s home should be marital not martial, for example), but this one stumps me. The photo depicts neither an ASHTRAY nor a BRA, and 1 Pcs $4 isn’t much help. One “personal computer system”? A “pretentious chopping set”? An item in a “precarious clothing series”? All would be a bargain at $4, I guess.
The last photo, snapped by my granddaughter, has a rather ominous tone:
Why offer a reason and then cross out the crucial word? What’s wrong with cash payment? Germs, counterfeits, an aversion to green pieces of paper? I can’t fill in the blank.
Feel free to send me your ideas. I promise a swift and safe response.
Eating tots in a bar with Satanised hands? Who wrote these signs? Jonathan Swift? Finger-licking good they’re not!
Either Jonathan Swift or Shirley Jackson!
I too thought of Swift with those Tots! There used to be a bar on the UES called Swifty’s, but it’s closed now. I guess cannibalism went out of style with Covid.
Have we finally found a silver lining to the Covid cloud?
Creepy signs, those first two! All great finds!
Thanks, Ellie!
I wasn’t familiar with her novels until I googled her. I’ll make her my next read, as long as no humans get eaten. I was thinking of Swift’s Modest Proposal.
I was thinking of her short story, “The “Lottery.” No cannibalism, but . . . I won’t spoil the surprise ending!
I watched the fictional movie “Shirley” last night on Max. It highlighted “The Lottery.” So, I earmarked it for my next read, as soon as I finish “Lone Woman,” which the NYT touted as one of the 10 best books of 2023. After all, “The Lottery” can’t be more horrifying than LaValle’s novel. Maybe the newspaper of record made a typo? It meant the “beast” novel?
“Beast novel” made me laugh out loud! I love your sense of humor, Bill.
Thanks. You made my evening.