Although a number of pet birds have flown around my living room through the years, I tend to divide avian wildlife in New York City into two categories, as this sign does:
Why single out pigeons? Here’s my theory: if you have one or two pigeons, they’re beautiful — a feathered palette of grays and whites with touches of black. But that’s never what you actually have. You have a flock, a megaflock, many megaflocks! You have a pigeony exponential growth-curve akin to the one Covid-19 has, unfortunately, made us all too familiar with.
Pigeons also make an appearance in this sign, which a reader spotted in a park:
The reader remarked that she “would have thought NYC already had plenty of these without anyone having to breed more.” I join her in rejecting this imperative sentence.
Still another pigeon, because, as I said, you really can’t have just one:
You can read this sign two ways. (1) You’re not required to feed a pigeon and clean-up, but doing so would be nice. (2) You’re not supposed to feed the pigeon, but you’re going to do it anyway, so could you please remove the inevitable end product? It’s the law. Which surprises me. I know there are all sorts of laws about snow removal — how much time may elapse after the last flake falls before you must shovel a path for pedestrians, for example. Is there also a time limit on poop? Do you have to sit around staring at the pigeon you’ve just (illegally) fed, so you can scoop the end product? Asking for a friend.
That’s it for pigeons, you’ll be glad to know. But not for birds. Below is one of the first signs I spotted when I started this blog:
Then, as now, I smiled to think of how you would sit . . . birds. Bend their little legs? Offer a chair? I’ll leave you with that image, hoping it cheers you, and any pigeons you’ve befriended.
I once had a button that read, “Keep our city clean, eat a pigeon for lunch.”
Very clear demand so not precisely pertinent, but was reminded of it by your post nonetheless.
Cheers, and keep ’em coming!
I guess if you call it squab, lunch makes sense. Cheers to you as well!
The audience may have been bit provincial for squab reference. Ah, the 70s…
😌
I first read the sign as Please do not sit ON birds – which was a tad scary! LOL
As for the Do not feed pigeons (or other birds), I once snapped a photo of a similar sign in my area, in which you can see about 20 pigeons and seagulls feasting on food scraps someone had brazenly thrown on the ground right at the foot of said sign! I think it’s a supreme example of irony; in fact I did a little blog post on it. Here’s the link: https://crossedeyesanddottedtees.wordpress.com/2018/05/05/the-definition-of-irony-part-2/
Love your post!
The supreme example of irony, indeed! Thanks for sharing. Stay safe!
I wouldn’t sit it, and I’d offer it a suitable chair instead. This way it would sit in its own manner, saving it from bending or maybe hurting the tiny legs.
A bird chair! Excellent idea.